This one is for the wives, girlfriends, side chicks desperately wanting to be the mains, mistresses, baes, or whatever titles you people use nowadays. Today is the Super Bowl Sunday, in other words today is National “If It Ain’t Football It Doesn’t Matter” Day, which means girlfriends, side chicks, wives are all out of a job for the day. This means no sex, no attention, and more importantly no sex! But like they say if you can’t beat, them join, at the Super Bowl party that is. But if you are going to do that and you aren’t the sharpest football fanatic in the bunch, here’s an article that will give you the “must knows” to save you from embarrassment and might even make you the life of the party!
First order of business, KNOW YOUR TEAMS!! The game today is headed between the Seattle Seahawks and the New England Patriots. Choose who’s side you want to be on and stick with it! Try not to be a “bandwagoner”, this is because even if your man chooses to have selective memory he WILL remember the team your chose for Super Bowl Sunday and so will all of his friends! But thank God for Google and cell phones, look up some quick stats and team members on each team and see who looks more favorable to you.
Number two, have the general idea of how football is played! Please do not go to these parties screaming foul when a man gets tackled! Common vocabulary you should know is, down, punt, yard, defense, offense, blitz, touch down, interception, tackle, fumble. Look them up and learn them!! Master these words!
Lastly, to help you with small talk look up the history of each team and what ever is being said about the both of them currently in the media. Here’s some help, the Patriots are in hot water for deflating their footballs, this will be a sure topic at the party and it is best that you season your self on it!
If all else fails, be the caterer for the party! One thing men love more than football is FOOD!! Make sure you supply the best hot wings and booze in town so that they will be too distracted by the savory greatness then to think about your lack of knowledge in football. If you are especially desperate, you can always host the party at your house, but then again you must have the perfect sized flat screen and sound system to keep everyone entertained because trust me a a small room full of angry men with an even smaller TV is never fun, especially if their team is losing.
Welp the game starts at 6:30 pm on NBC, which gives some time to buckle down and study! GOOD LUCK !! Don’t say TSR never gave you anything!
TSR STAFF: DEBRA OH!! @THE_EBONY_ISSUE ON INSTAGRAM , @TSR_EBONY_ISSUE ON TWITTER!!